Isn't it strange............

How sometimes you don't realise how much you would have liked something until you know you cant have it?

Sarah is going to America in June for an alternative placement, staying with her God mum, who is one of my most special friends. There was a chance that, if we had enough airmiles, I could join them for the second week. I had been holding back because it was complicated for lots of reasons (would there be enough, could I get the holiday etc) but we've just checked and there aren't any airmail seats available. So I dont have to work through any of the other complications because its a non starter. But I'd just begun to imagine sitting on A's deck, in the sunshine, reading, chatting, sipping wine, walking Biggles round the lake, shopping, chilling.................and realised how much I'd have loved it.

:(